Greetings from the Tundra.

Sweet Jeebus it’s cold. This is some artic bull kaka blowing outside and all through my drafty house.

For those of you not in the Southeast, there has been some sort of epic cold has blown through Western North Carolina with all of the fury of Anton Chigurh looking for missing dope. This is horrible.  Yes, I’m aware that there are colder parts of the country or the world, but I live in the South, where the winters are advertised as mild.  I always thought that mild meant a few cold snaps that jar the area, but nothing that would leave permanent marks. So far this winter has left welts, bruises and other protuberances that only Gorilla Monsoon could locate on a person’s person.

So we aren’t going outside. We should be okay, right? Wrong.  Jessie and I live in one of the coldest, draftiest houses that I’ve ever experienced. At this moment, we are waiting for a delivery of firewood to come so that we can get our living area nice and toasty. We’ll survive, but right now we are bundled up on the couch watching football and laughing at how cold it is.

The nice thing is that this weather is giving us a chance to spend one more day being close to each other before school starts again. Then, there’s not much happening until April.April, as of right now, is my saving grace; on Easter Sunday, Jessica and I are departing on a cruise which will take us to Jamaica and Grand Cayman.

As I sit here freezing- dying a little bit with each chill, even- I’m thinking about hot beaches, clear blue water and premium Jamaican weed (which I will be too cowardly to buy or try). I’m thinking about seeing new places with my lady and eating too much food. I’m thinking about screwing on a boat while Jimmy Buffett-sounding Muzak plays in the hallway outside of our cabin. I’m thinking about all of these things to stay warm, and it’s working a little.

So to my friends in Western NC, please stay warm today. To those who are experiencing even colder temperatures stay strong and warm (and yes, before you say it, I know that I am a wimp).

Until later,

Be good.